THE EGO AS DOLL

Certainly, a cherished doll – more loved than your own mother –
More than wife or husband –
More than life itself.

That’s a pretty heavy “doll,” isn’t it?

It’s something we’re prohibited from thinking about –
With a self-reflection ratio of zero/zero –
To date, no religious laws permit transcending that prohibition –
No direct commandments of God either.

That’s because, historically speaking,
There’s been nothing more dangerous than looking at one’s self
Eyes wide open
Since you can’t do it without the ego shriveling up and “dying.”

Jesus taught this lesson every day of his life – until the very end –
He knew his ego self had to “die” for him to “see” God –
So, during his life, he “died” over and over again.

Not for you or me –
But because he needed it himself –
And, needing it, he realized everyone else needed it too.

To die to one’s “ego self” –
Not on a tree –
Not to provoke Jewish leaders or Roman governors –

But simply because it’s the only way
To become one’s “true self.”

ONE DAY, SITTING UNDER MY FAVORITE TREE

I understand
We need light for clarity as well as its disinfectant powers
And darkness to grow underneath consciousness.

I understand
We need sweetness to lure us to habitual goodness
And sour to teach the necessity of a few bitter lessons.

I understand
We need pets while young to teach us about love
So that when we’ve grown up, we won’t fear vulnerability.

I understand
We need strong appetites both for learning and life,
Hearts that yearn after greater emotional consciousness,
And minds unafraid of any categories of emptiness.

One day, sitting under my favorite tree,
I hear a song I’ve always yearned to hear –
Starting low and steadily becoming stronger –
One voice – swelling into many –
Suddenly, I hear myself
Singing along with the rest of the world –
Aurally blossoming in a personal/communal joy –
One soul, one world, one God –

All of it – hopefully – in harmony!

GOD IS INVISIBLE AND SO ARE YOU (For Mary)

God is invisibly visible –

Like a leaf from yesterday’s tree
Or tomorrow’s –
There no longer,
And, also, not yet.

It’s the same with our love –
Which gets strengthened both by distance
And absence –
Coming towards you when you’re no longer there –
And, sometimes, arriving before you’ve even come.

God is visibly invisible –

Like a momentary personal “joy,” and, yes, even the primeval “Big Bang”
When everything in the universe that now exists instantly burst out of nothing –
In some sense, aren’t they the same – both an absolute surprise?

It’s the same with how I love you –
Invisible, but more real than anything else in the world.

Running along through innumerable sunny days –
Suddenly, I wake up, next to you.

This is all I want in life –

To be invisibly visible –
Next to you.

FLICKER

When a leaf falls,
It seems to take forever –
No one sees it go –
Yet, one morning, there’s a whole tree
Lying on the ground.

When we’re born, we don’t take up much room
But, as we grow older, we occupy more and more space,
Sometimes, even the entire world,
Later, however, for a variety of reasons, we start falling apart, and, one day,
Fortunately or unfortunately,
Disappear –

But what remains even longer than our bones or teeth?

Love, of course,
Love lasts forever –
Assuming it actually came into existence –
Assuming it wasn’t a lie.

Love is so memorable
It’ll be the last thing the universe forgets
Before finally flickering
Out.